A lazy update

The Bro Code

If you follow the sitcom How I met you Mother, one could recall in season 3 or 4 there’s a mention about the Bro Code. In fact Barney had it complied it into a book. It is a book regulating the relation between friends or more precisely stated, between Bros. Bro is a status of a person who is a level higher than an ordinary friend. Well at least that’s how I define a Bro. But nowadays it seems everybody is calling everybody a bro. Nonetheless, I think my definition suit any other things better.

 

So, sitting here out of boredom I think I should come out with my own bro code as once in a while, I get trapped in a situation where I need some reference and with that, I should be able to tell myself that in that particular situation, I should keep my mouth quiet or just run as fast as I can.

 

Bro Code No. 1

You shall not nag your Bro on things he already knows or you think he already knows.

 

Bro Code No. 2

You shall assist your Bro only when requested.

 

Bro Code No. 3

In the event that you think your Bro is not doing things right, let him be. He will learn better that way.

 

Bro Code No. 4

DO NOT date your Bro’s ex (wife or girlfriend).

 

Bro Code No. 5

DO NOT try to get into your Bro’s sister’s/daughter’s/wife’s/(or worse still mother’s and above) knickers.

 

Bro Code No. 6

Your Bro’s company is only good if there’s no girls (girls who do not fall within Bro Code No. 4 and 5) around.

 

[TBC with other Bro Code]

The Trip

Just got back from the Island of Legends for a firm trip. Supposedly everybody enjoyed the trip. To me, it was a good outing. Enjoyed a little and relaxed a little.

The boat tour was not bad after all. Got a good price for a boat for 10. Travel from Sg Tg Rhu to the Kilim Geo Forest Park. Saw a group of long tailed macaque swim towards our boat when we threw food into the water. Frankly, was impressed with the skill they've develop to survive.

And do you know that the best sharp shooter in the world is a type of fish?

Anyway, the reason of my posting today is my 6 nearly 7 month old daughter. There I was on the island trying to enjoy myself but I missed the faces at home and more on the 7 month old baby. Missed her terribly.

Drivers

I drive to work daily. One observation I have is that Malaysian, once they are behind the wheels they become this monster and there is no way we can fix that I think.

 

We forget what is zebra crossing, junction, stop look go signs etc.

 

The other morning, I saw this car weaving in and out on the freeway and I was asking myself why the driver drove as such? There is no reasons whatsoever to do that.

 

May be we become a bunch of retards when we are on the road and we are surprised when accidents happen on the freeway and people blame speed for that. To me speed is not a factor causing accidents but rather an aggravating factor. People speed on the Autobahn but the number of accidents are less compared to Malaysian roads. It is weaving in and out of the lanes cause accidents. Driving like an imbecile cause accidents. Not speed.

 

The other type is the type of drivers who like to hog the road. In 110km/h stretch, they drive at the speed of a bullock cart and of course, they will not give way at any time. Top that, those who sped have to take the left lane to overtake and that cause accidents as well (I think the police should give tickets to those who hog the road as well).

 

And all these cause those who at first follow the law to break the law as well. Thus, all of us become monsters on the road.

Respect to the Bench?

I was in the open court today. Not that I’m handling any case but just attending a friend’s call to the Bar. I think the last time I was in open court was on my call day nearly 9 years ago. Imagine how fast time flies.

 

But as I was there “enjoying” the speeches for the admission of new advocate and solicitor, the actions of the young lawyers sitting in front of me were just unacceptable and disrespectful to the court. Blatantly they were talking on their other matters and discussing things which are not related to the occasion at all.

 

I also noticed, that these lawyers were junior lawyers may be less than 5 years in practice. They show no respect at all to the court and to me even though I don’t go to court, I still reserve my respect to the bench despite all the things people are saying about the bench.

 

My question here is what happen to the time when people go to court and still have decorum. From their demeanour to what they are wearing. Can you believe me if I say these young lawyers go to court with skirt short enough to entice and long enough just to cover the appropriate parts? To me at least skirt length when your appear before the court must be at least knee length. Not showing more skin than cloth. I believe there’s a dress code issued by the Ketua Pendaftar for lawyers attending court. After that, I don’t care what those people wear. Just when you attend court.

 

I can go on and on about how lawyers behave in court but to me it’s just another way to waste your time. They go on and on complaining about other people especially the court, but lawyers themselves especially those who appear in open court every day should have known better.

Why Bosses Are Arseholes

Many people complained their bosses are arseholes. Some say they can’t stand their bosses. But you can’t run from the fact that bosses are arseholes and they are supposed to be one.

The line of fact reminds me of the story my late father objected very much when people started to call him boss. He kept on telling me until somehow or rather, it is engraved in my head and no doubt it has no truth in it whatsoever, but it explains very much why bosses are arseholes.

The Story

On one fine day the limbs and organ of human body had a meeting to discuss several matters. There were brain, eyes, nose, mouth, tongue, lungs, hands, stomach, legs and of course the arsehole. So they began the meeting with all the limbs and organ telling everybody their functions and what are their contributions to the human body.

Eyes started saying I see things and thus human are able to see, evaluate and enjoy the nature and beauty of the world and universe as a whole. The rest of the body says, yes, that’s true.

Then, the lungs says, I process the air human being breathe in and for that human being are able to have oxygen supply to the entire body. Yet again the whole body says yes, that’s true. On and on the entire body and limbs tell their functions and all of them agree that each of the limbs and organ have their own function.

Then the brain says, of all the functions, my contribution to the human body is the greatest and due to that, I will have to become the BOSS among all the limbs and organs in the human body. However, hand says, if hand refuse to follow brain’s instruction, then there nothing the brain can do. So human being are not able to grab thing or even feed themselves.

But, the legs say, “Wait a minute, I’m supposed to be the Boss among us”. He claimed, “If I don’t walk to the place human being wanted to go, then they are not able to go to the canteen or to work”. Then the lungs says, “if I don’t process the air human breathe in, then nobody can get oxygen from the air”.

Then the rest of them argued and tell the other limbs and organs their reasons why they are supposed to be the Boss until our little friend the arsehole says, “Hey, don’t forget me. If I don’t shit, nobody will be able to do things they are supposed to do”. All the human body organs and limbs laughed at arsehole. They say arsehole’s contribution not as great as theirs.

So arsehole says, “Okay then, from now on I will refuse to shit”. So days after days arsehole hold to his words and not shit. The whole body become weak, in pain so on and so forth. The worst is the stomach who came to the point until it can’t bear the bloated feeling anymore and that cause the brain to cease function because of the agony. When the brain stops working, the rest of the limbs and organs follow suit and finally the entire human body shut down because the arsehole refuse to shit.

At that moment, the brain says, “O arsehole, if you release us of this agony, we promise we make you Boss. Not any Boss but THE BOSS”, and arsehole agreed and went shitting. All the body limbs and organs went back to normal and thank arsehole. From that day on, the limbs and organs called arsehole “BOSS”.

The End

Moral of the Story

1) Bosses are arseholes; and

2) They are full of shit.

p/s.

Dear Staff,

Please refrain from calling me BOSS.

A post which I don't know the title

Posting once in a while makes me a person who plays tut-chak. Like the cookie chipsmore. Now you see, now you don’t.

 

Of Young Dato’s.

 

I stumbled upon a blog of a ex-serviceman, a Nuri pilot to be accurate who serves during emergency period. One of his post really got me in the head because from the post, I gather that some of those who serves the country did not even get proper recognition what more award (read monetary contributions/allowance) from the government although they give their lives for the country fighting the communist insurgency. Some lost their limbs and other lost their lives.

 

But having said that, we see more and more young Dato/Datuk running around here and there. What I am about to say here is not in any way being disrespectful to the Sultans/Rulers etc but once these young cikus being conferred datukships we wonder what contribution they give the country or at least he people? Like the datukships can be “arranged” when you are related to some people etc.

 

The latest young Dato’ I came across is the lawyer who is the main suspect in Sosilawati’s case and kid you not, came across many young lawyer Dato’ nowadays. They are not even 40 and they get the title which to me, they are not entitled to. Thus my question, “Beli ka?”.

 

Of course some justifications are forwarded that they are people who gives back to the people yadda yadda… but I don’t think compared to those who offered their limbs and lives, they deserve it. Can you imagine 27 year old Dato’? There are so many of them running around now. But when asked, most of them belong to certain quarter or connected to some quarters. Sadly, those who really deserve the honour failed to be honoured. Make you wonder, whether the rulers know who to give to or not but we all know before the ruler confer the title to a person, the list of candidates are vetted by the non-rulers (pegawai kerajaan most of them). So that’s why I’m saying I am not disrespectful to the rulers, Sultan etc but it keep me wondering until now.

 

Of Value of History.

 

I humbly think that the armed forces and the government should give and pay the dues to the servicemen first rather than these young guns and somebody should compile their stories and Filem Negara Malaysia should start having more ventures with Discovery Channel or NatGeo to educate the young on the value of the history so that they value the country more.

 

Failure to do that will result to what we have today. Yes, I don’t fly the Jalur Gemilang comes the merdeka celebration month but I am no less patriotic for that matter. I may appreciate more because I value the history of our country and I value those who sacrifice for our country.

 

But I guess, to the government, supporting Akademi Fantasia is more important than collaborating NatGeo. So, don’t blame the young when they value our independence less. My father in law, who was a history professor once told me, the budget given for historical research was way lesser compared to kebudayaan events.

 

So, history was left far-far behind and of course there are more and more Akademi Fantasia like shows on TV and to me the shows serve no purpose in Nation and Character building. No need to send young kids to BTN courses to make them love and appreciate their country. I know I love my country even I don’t go to any of the BTN courses which my brother went every semester I think.

 

So we can see where the priority is. Happy and less memory from our past. But don’t you think by educating our past to the young generation will make them more appreciative of what they have now? Recently during the merdeka period, I watched VAT69 (if you watch Band of Brothers this is a whisky brand and to prove it, please google), Emergency and some other documentaries on History Channel and Nat Geo and they were very informative and those involved are able to tell you their side of the story. How hard they toil to keep the country’s independence.

 

So let us do more and I urge the government to play greater role in educating and telling our young the struggle and the history. Our history good or bad. Let us treasure our most valuable assets (not only war time buildings) but also the stories. His and Her story*.

 

*Borrowed from Mr D’s class (School of Life starring Ryan Reynolds)